My name is Isambard Kingdom Brunel, engineer of such wonderful structures as the Great Western Railway, the Maidenhead Railway Bridge, several large ships and the double-buttocked bar-stool.

The esteemed and venerable aristocrat Lord Likely has given me the task of reconstructing his inter-net web-log, so that it may be refreshed and ‘one hundred per-cent sexier‘, to quote his lordship.

I gladly accepted the challenge, for I believe it will be one of the true tests of my engineering skills, and will push me on to greater heights than I e’er thought possible.

Plus his lordship has some incriminating photographic images of me indulging in some rather sordid shenanigans with a few parlour maids and a length of steel rod.

Work on the Lord Likely II, as I shall call it, will commence immediately and hopefully will be concluded on the twenty-ninth day of July in the year of our Lord eighteen fifty-seven. That is entirely dependent on how many tea-breaks my builders take during the works, of course.

It shall not be an easy undertaking. I shall have to reinforce the spunk girders, extend the fanny hole and make the necessary accommodations for his lordship’s considerable girth. But hopefully the end results will astound and stagger you all, and will lead to your juices ‘flowing like the mighty Niagara‘, as Lord Likely so eloquently puts it.

Do please bear with us during these exciting times.

Good-bye!

- Isambard Kingdom Brunel.

> Subscribe in a reader