Likely's Whore-Box


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"A journal so exciting, I fear I soiled myself no less than fourteen times."

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"Utterly wonderful. Upon reading Lord Likely's diaries, I went out and set fire to a homeless wretch to celebrate."

THE LONDON LOOKER

"I ejaculated so hard, my library had to be closed off for an entire week."

LORD FISHSTICK'S NEWSPAPER

"Everyone should buy a copy of these diaries, then have sex with them."

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"Hear ye, hear ye, Lord Likely is fucking ace!"

THE TOWN CRIER

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    • The Crest of Lord Likely

    Posts Tagged ‘Lord Eustace Likely’

    One Lord A-Leaping

    Friday, November 27th, 2009

    Lord Likely has designs on the lucrative festive book market…but his method of research for his proposed epic proves to be rather unorthodox.

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    Posted in Random Insertions | 7 Comments »

    Tunneling Into the Past

    Tuesday, July 8th, 2008

    20th June, 1857. Hmmm, now where was I? Ah yes. I had apparently lost my home and my entire estate to a couple of swarthy Italians in a drunken wager, and my man-servant and I were now attempting to sneak our way back into the Likely Estate via a secret tunnel, when all of a [...]

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    Posted in Disaster At The Likely Estate | 18 Comments »

    Up the Dirty Tunnel

    Monday, June 30th, 2008

    June 20th, 1857. Botter and I arrived at the village hall moments later, to find the place swarming with awful commoners, out displaying their fruit and vegetable in a terribly tedious Fruit and Veg Contest. I took a moment to rearrange one competitor’s display so that a carrot and two artfully-placed plums took on the [...]

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    Posted in Disaster At The Likely Estate | 7 Comments »

    Likely and Likelier

    Friday, October 12th, 2007

    July, 1856 Now there were two Likelys at the campsite, my glorious self, of course, and my half-brother Lightnin’ Lance Likely. This meant that now there was twice the sexual charisma, and double the loveliness, so to prevent us from being ravished by the cock-hungry braves of the Red Rump tribe, we decided to conduct [...]

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    Posted in An Astonishing American Adventure | 12 Comments »

    A Rather Drunk Englishman in New York

    Friday, September 7th, 2007

    July, 1856. Ludlow led Botter and I into his considerably spacious abode on the outskirts of New York City, stubbornly refusing to impart more information about my father’s continued existence. “Oh, don’t let us worry about that now!” he kept saying absently, ignoring my desire to very much worry about it now. I could have [...]

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    Posted in An Astonishing American Adventure | 12 Comments »

    The Outlawed Likely

    Tuesday, September 4th, 2007

    July, 1856. It is not often one learns that they have a hitherto unknown half-brother, who is on the run from the law and who is partial to wanton acts of bestiality. Indeed, many people may go through their entire life without learning such a fact. However, the Likely family tree is a tangled, over-grown [...]

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    Posted in An Astonishing American Adventure | 11 Comments »

    The Likely Family Tree

    Thursday, June 28th, 2007

    June, 1856 With all this talk of my family, I decided to while away the time during our journey to Southampton by attempting to sketch out the Likely Family Tree. I say attempt, as any effort to trace my family’s roots is rather a chore, largely thank to my father’s various marriages and relationships. It [...]

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    Posted in An Astonishing American Adventure | 10 Comments »

    A Lot of Likelys

    Monday, June 25th, 2007

    June, 1856 Botter, having regained consciousness, prepared the carriage for our immediate departure to Southampton, from where we would sail to America. As he busily set about his task, I stood around looking handsome and suave, as is my wont. “Milord,”said Botter, as he set about tethering my fastest horse, Reynolds, to the carriage. “Forgive [...]

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    Posted in An Astonishing American Adventure | 12 Comments »

    About His Lordship

    Lord Likely was a renowned member of the English aristocracy in the Victorian era. Tales of his exhilarating, enthralling and highly erotic exploits were legendary, but only now have his own, personal diaries resurfaced (found in a branch of Help the Aged in Swindon), shedding light on the life of this extraordinary eccentric.

    Warning: these journals contain material that some people may find terribly offensive, or incredibly arousing

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